5 Tips to Avoid Alcohol in Social Settings
Jake Newby
| 4 min read
Between the emergence of non-alcoholic (N/A) bars and entire months dedicated to abstaining from alcohol, our culture has never been more inclusive of sobriety and the sober curious. Still, if you have a history of social drinking but want to cut back, sidestepping the booze while out with friends and family can be tricky.
Give these tips a try the next time you are at an event where alcohol is present.
How to stay sober in social settings
Be firm with your intentions: Part of the reason it’s tricky to navigate sobriety in social settings is because of social pressure or the sometimes-awkward optics of not drinking. Hanging out with friends, coworkers and acquaintances you drank with in the past may naturally want you to join them if you don’t make your intentions clear from the start.
Before you get to your destination, let your group know you are not drinking so you can avoid making the same statement ahead of every round of drinks. If someone in your friend group offers you a drink at the event, politely say “no thanks, I’m not drinking tonight,” or “I’m not drinking right now.” Not everyone needs to know if your reason is deeper than that. And if you surround yourself with supportive people, everyone in your group should understand. If you encounter an uncomfortable situation with someone who pressures you, maybe that can serve as a lesson learned: that person probably isn’t worth being around in the future.
Drink N/A beverages: Avoiding alcohol in social settings can be a mental battle. Sitting at the bar without a drink in your hand might make you feel naked. Plus, you may go into a certain event with every intention to avoid alcohol only to feel like the odd person out as people order drinks, like you are depriving yourself. A nice mocktail can keep your hands busy and help you mimic a night of drinking, but it can also feel festive to sip on an elevated beverage instead of soda or water.
Set a time to leave: Having a firm exit strategy can be helpful for many reasons. If you know you’ll only be at an event for an hour and a half, for example, you have a finish line to strive toward. This should help you to relax and be sociable knowing you aren’t committed to spending hours with increasingly inebriated people. Express this time to at least a few people in your circle so they know your intentions and don’t think you’re leaving on a whim when the time comes.
Go all in on alcohol-free activities: This tip may not be useful if the social setting of choice is a bar with nothing else planned. If that is the case, you may want to rethink the outing altogether, especially if you think it could threaten your sobriety. Otherwise, focus your energy on the non-drinking elements of an event. Buy a hot dog and get into the game if you’re at a sporting event. Dig into bar trivia, arcade games, video games or other activities that are present. If it’s a family event, engage in meaningful time with relatives or have fun playing with younger siblings. Enter a social setting with the mindset that the event doesn’t revolve around booze.
Cling to a sober buddy: If it’s possible to bring along a friend who won’t drink or stick close to a non-drinker during a gathering, this can be a great way to maintain sobriety in a social setting. They have similar intentions as you, so you know they can relate to you, at least on that day. It takes pressure off you if you’re not the only one declining drinks, especially in a small, intimate group. Plus, as others have multiple drinks and get potentially more difficult to talk to or be around, you have a sober buddy there to chat with and lean on.
Parting thoughts: other tips to stay sober in social situations
It can always be tempting to drink at a social event, so piecing a plan together ahead of time can help you stick to your sobriety commitment. Go into an event knowing you will order a few mocktails and engage in the non-alcohol-related activities. Plan to strike up conversations with your sober buddy and commit to a time to leave.
It may also help some people to write a list of reasons why you won’t be drinking in the Notes application on your phone that you can refer to as needed. Perhaps notes like “I want to sleep well tonight and be refreshed for tomorrow” to “I want to be present and have memories of the event.” Everyone is different and will have varying reasons they want to stay sober but being as clear and thoughtful with your intentions ahead of time can only help.
Related:
- ‘Alcohol is Not Your Friend:’ BCBSM Medical Director of Behavioral Health Digs into His Passion for Advocating Against Alcohol Abuse
- Absence of Proof Detroit Appeals to Detroit’s Sober Curious Crowd with Non-Alcoholic Events
- Navigating Tough Teenage Conversations About Alcohol
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